Wednesday, May 31, 2006
5/31/2006 05:49:00 PM
today is my last day at NEC!
boss treated us to a sumptous lunch, farwell to Grace and I!
yum..prawns..fish..
and grace gave me an emily strange pouch. V. nice and V. cute:):):)
amy gave me lots of Chocolates! YUM. :D
Thank you! hugz.
i will miss everyone.
goodbye....
this is the last time i will be using the NEC laptop, the last time i will be sitting on this chair, the last time using the office phone and the last time logging into my lotus notes.
the last time...
after six months.
an end always lead to a new begining...
tatas.
all things charming
Brought to you by ElectricFriday
i cut and highlighted my hair yesterday at xpert studio at orchard with sh !
but my highlight isn't obvious leh!! :(:(
it's supposed to be RED.
and now it's like wine red..maroon..and super DARK.
so my hair is still..
BLACK.
unless u observe under the light u can see the hints of red everywhere.
cos my hair is so BLACK so the my hair stylist chose a VV light shade or red. almost pink.
but it still appeared kind of dark on my hair.V dark.
sad.
nvm.
-_-
cant really see the stupid red.
damn. hope it becomes more obvious after washing a few times!
sh cut his hair too! haha...he looked so PUNK ...cute!!! cos the stylish shaved off his sides..but the stylist said once his hair grow longer he will look super good:)
it's hilarious.
they thot i am a seventeen yr old poly student and that Sh is twenty plus!!
and when sh said his hair is V. short cos he is in NS
and the stylist said ' NS reservice?'
-_-" my bf got that lao3 ma...dun scare me can....
those peeps are really a friendly bunch..LOL.
gonna go there again!
but only for cutting my hair cos hair colouring there is quite ex..
next time going to source for an economical salon instead to retouch my colour! :)
:( wanted to watch movie with sh today but he has driving lesson.
but anyway guess i need to go home and ZzzZZ and recharge
oh tmr is June1st..
need to start appealing le..
not much hope though..but still there's a chance yar!
i think jenny and i wait for SE until our necks are super long le........... :( aiyah worst come to worst i just be bank investment promoter ba or give flyer for them ..
shouldn't be fussy anymore.
-------------------------------------------------
u are anything but ordinary.
beyond words &
beyond this universe
my life revolves arounds yours,
like ponies on a merry-go-round
we'll go up towards the rainbow
the pretty stars, and never down
we'll roll across the April meadows,
in the warmth we've found
a watercolour painting encased
in a golden frame - it never fades
we'll dance in the rain
silver splashes on our bright coloured wellies
we play, a silly game of
risks. we might fall, we might slip
a wall will always have creaks as
perfect things only occur , in our sleep
embrace the slightly withered petals
of the everlasting aster
for we see the beauty beneath
a secret we share
so profound and deep.
all things charming
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Tuesday, May 30, 2006
5/30/2006 04:16:00 PM
grace treated me to pastamania today!!
and then regina treated both of us to new zealand natural icecream for teatime today!
:):)
yum.
all things charming
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oh i just received a call from some Dr Rasmin from faculty of NUS engineering. 2nd call fom them.
he told me that he understands i am V. interested in dentistry and he told me by enrolling in electrical engineering i get to work with dentists cos i get to do biomedical imaging, X ray, modelling and stuff.
nope. that is not what i want to do okay?
why is NUS like so desperate to get pple?
no i am so not going NUS.
no way.
cos u didnt let me into dentistry.
all things charming
Brought to you by ElectricFriday
da vincci 's a nice movie!
gondolf turned out to be evil:(
sad
anyway yar it's my 2nd last day at the office
:) and :(
:) because i am sick of going all the way to harbourfront every weekday morning and i really want to wake up late.
and i can go out on weekdays with sh!
:( because i guess i will really miss my job and colleagues. not to say i am going to be jobless after this week.
okay i better go search for part time soon..
and i keep getting calls from nus....from some student club ....and the engineering fac officers.
all things charming
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Monday, May 29, 2006
5/29/2006 02:48:00 PM
someone pls save me.
i have been doing nothing all day long except sitting here starting at this screen.
no i am not complaining pls. i am happy that there is no work.
:) horray!
but i am really V.V sian, jumping from fiddling with my blog template to using internet sms and checking my stagnant mail to chatting with no one on web msn.
and they blocked even cartoonnetwork now!! i cant play my game!
@#$#$&@*
this is really horrible.
my head feels like it's going to explode any moment. this headache is killing me.
and i dunnoe how am i going to watch da vinici with my family tonight.
and my stomach feels like an ocean. i feel the waves crashing towards my gut wall.
probably drank too much water.
i need to empty my bladder.
but i just came back supposedly from the toilet a few moments ago. supposedly because i went to visit amy instead cos i was just too bored.
tried to take a nap but its really too obvious. this office's like a cramp classroom.
i dropped my last panadol into the bottom of my bag and i can't find it.
not like panadol's going to help much anyway.
all things charming
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I VERY VERY SIANNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNnn
YAWNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNnnnnnnnnnn
all things charming
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Sunday, May 28, 2006
5/28/2006 04:40:00 PM
saturday went shopping with jenny in the afternoon!!!
we like walked all over the whole suntec and marina square..$#%%&#
we got lost like a couple of times.. -_-)" marina square's like a maze! next time go better bring da map along..
let's see i bought quite a no. of things.. = happy ,and kinda broke
me and jenny in the fitting rm!
SMILE!
hey jenny maybe we should just get our favourite toP!
then later went to orchard to meet sh to cut our hair. BUT THE STUPID SHOP CLOSED!!! @#$%#@
so in the end we had our dinner.....and slacked....and walked around...
all things charming
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Saturday, May 27, 2006
5/27/2006 12:09:00 AM
today during lunch break i went to PS to eat with jenny!
we ate fish soup at the foodcourt:)
GGS!! but no time to see so sad..
office nothing to do so i entertained myself whole day with cartoonnetwork games and msn and internet sms!!!
shuang3!!! shuang shuang shuang3!
ate at pizzahut with sh just now and then we went arcade.
oh horrid. the mummy dunnoe what eygptian game is sooo LAME can. firstly the gun looks idiotic in the shape of mummy. 2ndly the visual effect sucks. mummies shatter when you shoot them. and so 2D. and it's extremely comical. and i chose the fireball so i only have like 4 bullets?? -_-)"
so in the end because i kept laughing and laughing i lost.
and i died at like the same stage at time crisis 3.
and we FINALLY got to try house of the dead4! but it was 2 bucks a game cos it's new.
AND we died SOOOOOOOO soon!!!!! bet the pple watching behind were snickering lor.
so SHAme shame!!
dunnoe how to play then dun play lah!
LOLOL.
oh then we decided to sit down and eat cake at secret recipe cos poor sh was lugging such a big bag with all his dirty clothes. but i helped him carried his stuff ! and i carried my own bag!:):)
well an evening well spent:)
good night and sweet dreams:) ^_^
oh yar i got the letter saying i got into USP. ok no biggie. EVERYONE gets it ithink.
except DENT AND MED pple...haha.
but anyway i not going NUS so haha they wasted paper.
oh and now a lot of cafes/restaurants hiring pple! me want to parttime!
last but not least..
eL adores sh's side view.
all things charming
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Friday, May 26, 2006
5/26/2006 03:16:00 PM
the great singapore sale starts today!!
let's go on mega shopping spree!
sob, sh not free this weekend to shop with me.
but jenny and i going out together in the afternoon to SHOP SHOP SHOP!
and next weekend i not free.
i will be serving shoppers instead.
so exciting!!
all things charming
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oh no i talked to the infosystem engineer anthony and he told me that there is a over supply of software programmers in s'pore..in fact.. they have problem finding job, including him!
he says the market here for IT is kind of like saturated...IT is going to die.
and i asked him which is more recommended, computing or computer engineering..
and he says computing is quite restricted to programming..but computer enginnering u get to do R&D and hardware stuff so even if u can't find a programming job ya know, u still won't break your ricebowl.
conclusion: it is not advisable to pursue studies in computing/computer engineering whatsoever.
and my colleaguges asked me why not chem engine or pharmacy or life sciences since i do bio&chem in jc and since the life sci market in singaproe is rapidly expanding.
i guess i dun have the interest in cells or chemicals ba.
shit la. i am going to have difficulty finding job once i graduate from NTU. after 1 year still rotting at home. then finally find a 1k per month job whereby a dip person can also do. and then get retrenched.
so should i just do life sciences like everyone else is doing? but i din apply for it.
i am dead.
i am so dead. i am so going to starve and sleep on the streets.
me no future le. me useless person.
all things charming
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tut yesterday
dear tut kid forgot there's tutition.
there seems to be some gathering at her house, with the fragrance of curry and other delicious food.
but too bad she still has to take tut since i was there.
me: show me your maths paper
D: we returned it to our teacher today
me: so what am i supposed to do with you today?? why didn't you shift the lesson to yesterday so i could have gone through with you? nvm, take your your 3B textbook.
anyway i taught her fractions. hope she remembers. cos she was so distracted apparently. i mean exams are just over and yar i understand there is just no mood.
bought her chocolates and sweets as a form of encouragement. let her out after only like 40 mins cos she kept staring at the clock and her little cousin outside kept calling for her.
bought chicken biscuits downstairs cos i was so hungry and my father took so long to arrive.
his 'on the way' = 'on the way from north pole'
while i was happily munching away i met with D's mom who just came back from work. and she started telling me how many carless mistakes D made in her maths paper and how many marks she lost because she DID NOT DRAW MODELS although time and time again i have been reminding her even scolding her to do so!!!! @!%#$@
she king lor..(_ _)ZzZ
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
i have made up like 80% of my mind to go to NTU, and the 20remaining % feels tat i shud go NUS.
i just know i have to study hard to get 1st/2nd class honours in order to be eligible for MBA.
sigh maybe all these is predestined. i am not destined to be a dentist and i don't deserve to be one.
ok i shall stop wallowing in all these...
i really don't look forward to my new begining at NTU..
i didn't went for the tea party organized by the computing+ biz faculty so i really have no idea how the campus looks like, or who my future classmates are, or how many pple are takingDDP.
i have never stepped into NTU before.
i don't know anyone else going NTU besides jenny who hasn't even decided whether to study at NTU/NUS.
:(
this is so pathetic.
all things charming
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Thursday, May 25, 2006
5/25/2006 03:20:00 PM
look iam blogging again. u must think i am V. free.
that's true. i am V. free. just shaking leg now.
V. shuang
but never bring my book to read..:(
and grace bought peanut pancake for me to eat today :)
sh said this blog template is V. hideous and V.ugly.
is it?
of cos NOT! i think it's a V. good one.
dun noe why no one on msn now. if u are on msn now can u pls talk to me. cos i am V. bored.
today got tut, tmr go out with sh! we are eating pizza hut.
oh we ate thai express on monday...
but wasn't a nice outing lar cos the brown envelope had not arrived at that time yet.
come to think of it all this seems very ke3 xi1.
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i see a light.
so computer engineering under faculty of engineering (dept of electrical & computer engineering) is more about hardware .. embedded systems, signals, microprocessors, digital design, circuit design...
computer engineering under sch of computing would be involving data structures, algorithms, high order functions, programming methodology, artifical intelligence, different programming languages, debugging, coding etc etc.
so which one sounds better uh?
the 2nd one sounds more sophisicated right.. but kind of dry..
and apparently to study computer engineering u only need to have A level maths.
so my chemistry and biology would become so fei4.
i am starting to get worried. what if during this course of 4-5 years i realise IT is not what i want to do? and everyday face the stupid screen do programming whole day.
in the boring mosquito infested NTU campus..with pple like me wearing shorts and slippers to school cos like 80% of them live in hostel..
the only interesting thing is that i might be able to acquire enough knowledge to hack into some infosystem to get $$$$$. then pple all around the world will know me as friday the hacker. and i will be famous and rich but whole day hide inside my room and hack into organisations and accounts to reveal top secrets and confidental information. LOLOL. just kidding okay.
or maybe the biz degree would allow me to be the next CEO of microsoft!! -_-
(in my dreams)
if only i got into dentistry. then i dun need to worry about all these.
well, if only.
on another note, my tut kid's mom smsed to tell me that there is improvement in her maths exam marks, but still band 3...thanks to me she says..
(bu4 gan3 dan1...wish she did better)
shall go today to find out what went wrong..
all things charming
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the computer engineering of the double degree in NTU is under the school of COMPUTING, not the school of ENGINEERING!
shit! so i will be doing things like programming?
and those who studied computing in poly/jc will fare much better than me!
so should i study in NUS instead?
but i didn't get in the Double Degree Programme (biz and engine) in NUS! (cos i put as 4th choice -_-)
unless i appeal for dentistry AND DDP.
and DDP in NUS takes 5 years. and i would be studying in the Faculty of Engineering, not computing.
someone pls help me..:(
and pls dun ask me why i am choosing to study computers.
1) i have no interest in chem engine/life sci/pharmacy
2) i cant get into dentistry
somehow ithink my 2 years in jc is wasted. why did i study bio and chem....
-_-
aiyah study so hard somemore.
my life is in chaos!!!!!
i need a hair cut! my hair all tangled up!
my courses are all in a mess!
:(
all things charming
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Wednesday, May 24, 2006
5/24/2006 09:32:00 AM
tell me why my coffee is so bitter today.
oh u just didn't add any sugar.
i did, in fact i added 3 big spoonfuls.
________________________________________________________
stupid uncle jumped my queue at jollybean.
cant u see i came FIRST?
u are probably blind.
disgusting creature. still buy so much beancurd and pancake.
stuff yourself!! stuff yourself until u have high BP.
LOL.
if not because i am feeling exhausted i would have bashed u up. yea, until your eyeballs drop into your beancurd.
stupid auntie gave me chocolate pancake when the tag there says cheese AND chocolate pancake.
u are blind too. BIG RETARD. RETARD RETARD RETARD.
and the pancake is COLD. i have to put it into the microwave.
and it tastes like shit. i am not going jollybean ever again.
go and die.
______________________________________________________________
so the long awaited truth has arrived yesterday.
and i think NUS ADmission office is so f**ked up. probably someone don't get into med because one of the stupid staff doze off halfway or something during admin work.
and u aren't just disrupting that person's future u know....:( its going to affect more than one person!!
of cos i am not refering to my case.
i have nothing to say about my case of course. something went wrong with my manual dext /interview.
blame it on incompetency & luck. well i guess i did try mybest. but my best wasn't enough for thie highly competitive dentistry course.
life's like that isn't it. u dun get everything you want.
others get it. you don't.
and u just have to accept it.
u are stripped of something that u want very very much ..
u had a chance.. but ur grip sorta loosened, and the kite whose string was in your hand flew away. just like that.
the loss, the regret, the pain...
it's like being plunged into a black hole.
it must be the biggest setback of my life. a failure that will change my whole entire life.
i will always look back at this year, and shake my head in sorrow.
maybe i am just not cut to be a dentist.
it's over.
don'tworry , i am over the misery stage already.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
so i know how my future is going to envelope now.
i am going NTU to study the computer engineering and business (IT management) double degree for four years. i am going to stay in the hostel because NTU is so inaccessible.
pls dun ask me why i am not going nus. i only get in engineering and because i put it as my fourth choice i have not been shortlisted for the interview to be enrolled in the double degree engineering and biz. what a poor thing uh.
anyway i will study hard in NTU to get honours.
four years later i will probably take up MBA overseas.
and hopefully when i come back i can find a nice job in a well known infocomm company with a good enough income. and hopefully i will get promoted in a few years time.
and it would be best if i get the IDA scholarship. (pls shortlist me .......)
oh and i wont go for any orientation programmes in july.
social interaction isn't very appealing right now. in fact i am not interested at all.
and of cos i am going to apply for appeal to get in dentistry. i won't give up until the very end. humph!!
_____________________________________________________
so the whole of yesterday was spent cooped up with my house / banging things/screaming at everyone/feeling bitter about everything that has happened....
and thinking about my future, OUR future..
it seems the perfect pretty picture got shattered by a huge blow.
no more perfect picture. no more.
this is the worst scenario.
______________________________________________________
i am accepting things gracefully.
i am being nonchalant about this whole thing.
only happy thing is vic says she is going to treat me to sakae sushi buffet.
and it seems my family members are feeling sympathetic towards me . i dun have to wipe the table after dinner. (for now)
and get vic to do things by saying "aiyah u get in med while i am going to ntu le. i am living in hostel le so u tong2 qin2 wo3 ba.."
__________________________________________________________
all things charming
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Monday, May 22, 2006
5/22/2006 04:36:00 PM
the leaf fell gently onto the water
and was brought away by the river.
its destiny i can't tell,
its fate i can't determine.
if you see the leaf , please,
kindly pick it up and
return it to where it belongs.
and i shall be eternally
grateful.
all things charming
Brought to you by ElectricFriday
tsk tsk. it's only monday.
so nan2 guo4 can.
:(
someoneplshelp.
all things charming
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yar as in i am happy for vic who got in med.
at least next time i know i can save on my medical fees next time can ask her to give me mc. good good good. v. good.
yar.
but things are realy saddening right now u know
i am trying not to think about it.
but then again i am only rotting here in the office it's hard not to think about it.
wonder why i always dun get what i want.
like ireally wanted to study 3rd lang french like vic i didn't get in.
then i realy wanted to take 9 sub in sec 3 i didn't get in too.
then i really wanted to take phy s paper i couldn't get in also.
and now ...
ok nvm if i dun get in i have nothing to say.
as in what can i say? just too bad that is.
i feel like shit today again.
all things charming
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so my nus application status page still says ' PROCESSING'
and vic and i live at the same place she got her brown package.
and everyone else has gotten it.
pls just give me a reply nus.
u are disrupting my life here.
i mean yar if i dun get in just tell me i dun get in la!
all things charming
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weekend was working at kovan..
standing and stoning.
heartland mall is a really sucky place besides the fact i have worked there for 5weekends.
there are only 6 toiletbowls catering to the females in the whole building.
3 in each toilet for each floor. and either one restroom is always 'cleaning in progress'
and everytime u need to pee/shit/puke u need to queue up.
and there's no toilet paper in the cubicles.
and it stinks.
there are so many pple but only a few drop by the rdshow.
that leaves me staring into space /talking/entertaining myself/playing phone games.
on sat i was talking to the 2 se promoters..and then we saw this man like 2m in front of us having a fit..
then pple started surrounding him and watching..and some started dialling 995.
think the man bit his tongue blood started spurting from his mouth..and some foamy white thing..
and the security guards came and some kind passerbys wiped the blood/substance from his mouth. and together they shifted him into a position so he was lying on his side.
the paramedics soon came and they took his blood pressure and stuff and the security guards and them lifted him onto the stretcher.
and then the passerbys left one by one..
and the toilet auntie came to mop away the blood/substance on the floor.
and we carried on with stoning/talking.
all things charming
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Friday, May 19, 2006
5/19/2006 05:31:00 PM
argh i dun feel good.......
me rotting in office now..
which is good.. cos i am so lazy i rather rot..
anyway i dun feel good because i feel v. queasy.
think macs for both breakfast and lunch is putting my poor stomach to too much stress.
maybe it has problem digesting the fats or something..
i feel the oil up to my throat..
DISGUSTING..
how how how..only have myself to blame..
sobz.
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-_-
just received a call from the agency
K: hi this is XX, will u be working tmr?
me: what's happening tmr?
K: oh actually we would need you to be on a different assignment. we need you to give out flyers
me: oh i am working tmr. (which is true)
K: ok..thanks.
WHAT? from SE PROMOTER TO what?? GIVE OUT FLYERS?
what shit.
YOU WANT ME TO GIVE OUT FLYERS?
%$#@!^@*##$
all things charming
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i have nothing to do now. rotting in office.
anyway saw this on aaron's blog so i shall do it for fun. or from stopping myself from dozing off.
Instructions:
1. Bold the following words that are true about you.
2. Purple! the things you wish were true.
3. add one thing true about you
I don't watch TV these days.
I own lots of books.
I wear glasses or contact lens.
I love to play video games.
I've tried marijuana. I've been in a threesome.
I've been the psycho-ex in a past relationship.
I believe honesty is usually the best policy.
I curse sometimes. (hm,most of the time.)
I have changed a lot mentally over the last year.
I carry my knife/razor everywhere with me.
I'm TOTALLY smart.
I've broken someone's bones.
I'm paranoid sometimes.
I would get plastic surgery if it were 100% safe, free of cost and scar-free.
I need money right now.
I love sushi.
I talk really, really fast/unclear.
I have long hair.
I have lost money in Las Vegas.
I have at least one sibling.
I have worn fake hair/fingernails/eyelashes in the past.
I couldn't survive without Caller I.D.
I like the way I look.
I am usually pessimistic.
I have a lot of mood swings.
I have a hidden talent.
I'm always hyper no matter how much sugar I have.
I have a lot of friends.
I am currently single!
I have pecked someone of the same sex.
I enjoy talking on the phone.
I practically live in sweatpants or PJ pants.
I love to shop.
Enjoy window-shopping.
I would rather shop than eat.
I don't hate anyone.
I'm a pretty good dancer.
I'm completely embarrassed to be seen with my mother.
I have a cell phone.
I believe in God.
I watch MTV on a daily basis.
I have passed out drunk in the past 6 months.
I've rejected someone before.
I have no idea what I want to do for the rest of my life.
I want to have children in the future.
I have changed a diaper before.
I've called the cops on a friend before.
I'm not allergic to anything.
I have a lot to learn.
I have been with someone at least 10 years older or younger.
I am shy around the opposite sex.
I have made a move on a friend or crush in the past.
I own the "South Park" movie.
I would die for my best friends.
I think that Pizza Hut has the best pizza.
I have used my sexuality to advance my career.
I love Michael Jackson, scandals and all.
Halloween is awesome because you get free candy.
I watch Spongebob Squarepants and I like it.
I have dated a close friend's ex.
I am happy at this moment.
I'm obsessed with guys.
Democrat.
I am punk rockish.
I am preppy.
I study for tests most of the time.
I tie my shoelaces differently from anyone I've ever met.
I can work on a car.
I love my job.
I am comfortable with who I am now.
I have more than just my ears pierced.
I walk barefoot wherever I can. (only at the beach)
I have jumped off a bridge.
I love sea turtles.
I spend ridiculous money on makeup.
I plan on achieving a major goal/dream.
I'm proficient in a musical instrument.
I worked at MacDonald's restaurant.
I hate office jobs.
I love sci-fi movies.
I think water rules.
I went college out of state.
I like sausages.
I love kisses.
I fall for the wrong people.
I adore bright colours.
I can't live without black eyeliner.
I don't know why the hell I just did this stupid thing.
I usually like covers more than originals.
I can pick up things with my toes.
I can't whistle.
I can move my tongues in waves, much like a snakes slithers.
I have ridden/owned a horse.
I still have every journal I've ever written in.
I can't stick to a diet.
I talk in my sleep.
I try to forget things by drowning them out with loads of distraction.
Climbing trees is a brilliant past-time.
I have jazz in my blood.
I wear a toe ring.
I have a tattoo.
I can't stand at LEAST one person I work with.
I am a caffeine junkie.
I cosplay or know what cosplaying is.
I have been to over 15 conventions.
I will collect anything, and the more nonsensical, the better.
I'm an artist.
I only clean my room when necessary.
I like a person of the same sex.
I love being happy.
I am an adrenaline junkie.
I have ridden an elephant.
I love chocolates and crowns!
I go to school NOT for the sake of lessons.
I can't ride a bicycle.
I think i'm the only person crazy enough to do this at 6 in the morning without any sleep for the night.
I feel crazy.
I love tomatoes!!
I like peanut butter on bananas.
Been told "You're on fire!"
I have freaking straight teeth without braces.
i want to be a salesgirl.
I'm a rly slow reader.
i hate school.
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guess most peeps have visited the gay blog...
and the lebsian jean/mich blog..
but seriously i think lebsians are seriously like GROSS.
but not gays..gays seem pretty fine to me..but lebsians...ew..hahaha
all things charming
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yesterday went out with sh after work..
had chicken rice at novena :) sh says got XO fish head bee hoon but the shop turned out to sell just normal fish head bee hoon. -_-
so we ate at the chicken rice stall recommended by vic who frequents there with her colleagues.
and sh was sooooooo sleepy :( cos he stayed up to watch soccer -_-
and then we went starbucks at united square and had banana mocha frap.
the starbucks there is really the biggest/nicest
it was really my stomach's lucky day..chicken bryani and ban mian in the afternoon and chicken rice for dinner one ..cos got so many couches and nice music and fountain to see.
my appetite is seriously growing...
i should really stop thinking about food the whole day long.
all things charming
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Thursday, May 18, 2006
5/18/2006 05:25:00 PM
=)
went with amy for lunch at seah im today
well i couldnt decide between bryani curry chicken rice or ban mian.
so in the end i ate BOTH!!
LOL.
so greedy..what a glutton right..
but i couldn't help it mah..
so in the end i got stomachache just now..:(
dunnoe why suddenly my appetite so big. sometimes i dun even feel like eating and can even skip lunch and survive on a few biscuits or a muffin for the whole day.
weird.
all things charming
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Wednesday, May 17, 2006
5/17/2006 10:14:00 PM
today after work went for SE interview!
jenny late!!!
still say knock off earlier than me -_-"
still say that building very near can walk -_-"
in the end we took bus for like 10 minutes -_-"
lucky this auntie on the bus told us where to alight....so nice!!
so we were running all the way in..
and yea!
ok not sure if confirm get in..
but still it's half success le!
all things charming
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good morning ..
yawn*
another day at work.
and today i was at the bus stop below my house waiting for bus to go yck mrt station..and the bus came, and everyone boarded the bus, except for me.
why? because i realised i didn't have my wallet with me. @##@@&^%
So i crossed the 8 lane road again and went up to get my wallet.
and i couldnt find it... so i searched everywhere.......i was like throwing my clothes everywhere cos i thot it might be buried somewhere there.
and finally i saw it beneath my bed. great. how did my wallet end up there?
so i was late to work today..
all things charming
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Tuesday, May 16, 2006
5/16/2006 10:40:00 PM
fairytales don't exist.
briefly perhaps.
in a moment, everything can change. the warm tender air may just freeze suddenly, before you even manage to blink once, so your eyes remain wide open, frozen like yoghurt.
and the blade that u are using to slice apples to make an apple pie may suddenly cut deep into your fingers.
u may find yourself being twisted in a gruesome manner when u fall while ice skating with much delight.
one day we will all wake up from whatever we are in,
and weep in our bitterness and sorrow.
promises are merely words. they don't mean anything.
they are perhaps just things to deceive our own hearts.
sometimes one holds on to something so much..
no matter what happens..
she/he still wouldn't give up.
and that's the spirit of love i guess.
even if the sky turns a darker shade,
even if the apple pie in the oven gets horribly burnt,
even if the blade that's stuck in your finger hurts so much...
well there's always tmr:)
love is never giving up, always accepting never condemning.
love is forgiving and forgetting.
love is painfully beautiful, as always.
all things charming
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i feel like shit seriously.
i went to the toilet just now and i caught my reflection while looking washing my hands... no, i seldom into the mirror these days..
oh anyway i caught my reflection and i paused momentarily..
cos staring back at me is a hideous face...
maybe time is really catching up with me..creases below my eyes..
and horrible brown eyebags..red veins appearing on the white of my eye..
and my lips....they are dried and peeling, esp my bottom lip..
oh dear have i reached the stage whereby make up is totally necessary when meeting pple? on going out days i put foundation and white shimmer below my eyes to hide those hideous bags. i have stopped putting on makeup for a long long time for work cos i only have 5 mins or so to get myself out of the house and i think it is highly unnecessary.
and my fringe is overgrown and well covering my eyes..and the rest of my hair is curling in all directions. i dun think i have combed my hair for weeks come to think of it.
and i feel......extremely tired..
been trying to conc on work on this database but voices around me are too distracting.. it seems unusually cold in the office today..and the air's kind of stale uh..throat is starting to feel coarse..
and when i walk i just can't stand straight...really feel like crouching..or crawling...
and my neck and back really hurts now from sitting for hours in front of this laptop..i know my productivity is decreasing exponentially..
there seems to be some kind of rash on my wrist..dont know why..
and i feel so very hungry because i queued up at the post office during my lunch hour and went wastons. time does pass and before i knew it my lunch break is over.don't know why i can feel waves of acid crashing upon my stomach walls , although i did eat breakfast at ya kun.
sigh what's happening uh.not enough sleep maybe. body rebelling towards work..?
not exactly in the best mood today anyway :( sobz.
u really made me sound v. bad...
i really really hate you.
u don't know how unreasonable you are
it is freaking disgusting u know.
sighhhhhhhhh. i feel so fucking pathetic.
going to stuff myself good later for dinner..i am really v. hungry.
ok 2 more weeks left i m free. time does pass painfully..
and the envelope from nus... expected outcome
anyway i look forward to june yar...
all things charming
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Monday, May 15, 2006
5/15/2006 12:34:00 PM
yesterday went out with sh!
we were supposed to watch MI III at lido at 2 p.m..but i came late (Sorry sh!) and we watched the one at 3.50 in the digital thearte instead:)
so before that we went delifrance (sh has vouchers). sh decided to try bistro food..me was apprehensive so ate the classic sandwich.
think bistro really sucks.
1) The portion is less than pasta mania
2) and what u see is NOT what u get
3) the service is so poor...we came FIRST and the stupid waiter served other pple first. the food took so long to arrive but the waiter was so quick to remove our empty plates and bowls.
haha and after that sh smell like onion cos he drank this onion soup..
anyway we realy wanted to sit and slack at delifrance since we manged to chop the sofa seat..but then pple started coming in..and the waiter cleared all our plates except our drinks..so we were kind of forced to leave. then we went isetan supermarket and there was a jap icecream cone sale.. japanese snow on green tea:)
oh and sh the 2nd dropped from my handbag!! but luckily one passerby noticed and he picked it up and passed to sh :)
so sh the 2nd sleeping inside my bag now scared drop again.
after the movie we went borders and i read some really nice poems
i saw this line 'The cat knows where flies die/See ghosts in motes of air/and shadows in sunbeams' which i think is really very nice.
me loves poems. penned a poem on sms last night for sh and he said it's romantic!
then we went marina bay for steamboat.
went to the same place that CO had gathering last time.
because they provide free shuttle bus
and guess who we saw? xuanzhong!
sorry sh i very bad cook the meat either raw/black but then shouldn't eat that too much cos wait kana cancer/poison.
anyway the meat were in such a big chunks so a bit gross cos put in water big chunk take out also big chunk so hard to put inside the mouth.
me ate loads of prawns,think sh shocked at my appeitie for prawns.
and sh didn't eat any..cos he allergic or something :(
and we wanted to watch stars but didn't see any stars except a planet.
and sh think i beng4 cos i say only got one star and he said it is not a star it is a planet..
oh and dunnoe why sh chose jackfruit icecream..jackfruit very smelly lor.. smells like cat shit really.
then sh sent me home and poor sh so sleepy say he want to sleep on the chairs beside the pool and haha he started lying on the busstop seats -_- but yea he made it home safe and sound:)
the moment i stepped home vic started picking on me!
ask her if she wants to eat the biscuits i bought from marks&spencers she gave me a face lor and started scolding me to clear my clothes..
pls la just a few pieces only mah! and it's really none of her biz i like to leave my things around. why she must liddat..and i think she bias against sh or something maybe she pms ba.
then we started quarrelling and my mom got angry cos we disturbed her.. :(
oh at office today a lady from GM recruitment called me and asked me if i was still interested in the job of ice cream scooper which i applied to last week.
i asked her what brand and she said new brand and it's at downtown east.
downtown east?? that's like going to the moon seriously. going to the moon to scoop icecream sounds a bit stupid.
and somemore new unknown brand..
if ben & jerry or hagan dazz i dun mind lor cos sh can pick me up from work and i can leave him a big tub of icecream :)and i can have icecream for breakfast/lunch/dinner.
and today jenny reminded me to call the guy that my SE friend intro me.
anyway i called him and he said yar he's still looking for promoters...
and jenny and i going down tmr after work:)
aiyah i never clarify leh, dunnoe looking for SE or o2.
i dun want 02 lor, 1)less$ 2) o2 so difficult to use! software always a bit cock one the last time so many pple with 02 visited jabra booth and really got problem lor always cannot connect.
was watching tv with vic just now i saw an ultra fat lizard..
so i asked if vic if she saw it and she said no.
and i said " u didn't see it? it's as fat as you!'
then vic got angry and said what i was implying.
but really i wasn't implying anything lor! i mean 'as fat as' is just a way to describe size mah!
and she said 'u are as stupid as the stupidest person on this earth'
-_-
anyway dinner was ready so didn't argue anymore..oh dinner my mom cooked tom yam prawns.. and i didn't eat a single one...LOL.
all things charming
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Saturday, May 13, 2006
5/13/2006 10:13:00 PM
Vesak day
breakfast together:)
sh staring at the lens cos he always appears closed eye when the camera snaps.
OMG! look at sh's fone and wallet! my work! MUHAHAHa!!
after walking around decided to sit down again...morning sun isn't very friendly..
sh eating...
apparently sh is still v. sleepy...
oohh love charms sh and el the 2nds holding hands:)
haha after that sent sh to vch at raffles place..
the sun became more unfriendly..and i found myself walking from cavogsen (erm is this correct) bridge to anderson bridge and back to cavogsen bridge..
then went to bugis to meet vic and bunch...
lol.
and back to raffles place..
lol
at night ida admin off called at 11+ -_-
person: elizabeth this is just to remind u to turn up tmr
me: yup sure i will be there thank you
person: heard from your brother u changed your hp.no right?
me: (raises eyebrows since when i have brother..LOL) erm that's right
person: yup so ask him to forward any smses to you
me: sure no problem thank you!
haha so sh is my brother..ok i will always be careful of whose hp no. to look le..
all things charming
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ok..
today i woke up damn early at 6.30 a.mto go for IDA psychometric test..and it is at bouna vista...so far..
but my dad offered to give me a ride :)
so i reached civil service college at erm 7.45 when the test is 8.45a.m..
and guess what? one guy was already there! so kiasu..-_-
the caterferia is so nice, although not opened yet, had to walk to hawker centre to get my coffee..which uncle put in a transparent takeaway plastic bag and i placed it on the caterferia table and the coffee spilled out -_- irritating because
1) i had to walk out to the hawker centre so mafan..i mean a drink vending machine is every building's basic service!
2)had to go to toilet to take toilet paper to clear the mess(me being such a considerate person) but u know i went toilet and i forgot my purpose of going there..so did my biz and came out and went back in after looking at the mess..-_-
oh anyway the cateferia is so nice ..with blue sofas and silver tables..even nicer than coffeebeans/starbucks.. government buildings are all so nicely furnished..
test was damn hard. IQ test...where got psychometric?? i forgot all my maths..dunnoe what the shit is median..and i really have a problem with rate..(lucky i have pri3 standard because of my tut kid)
and no time sia!
oh it really reminds me of SAT..
and for SAT i got a horribly low score, probably lowest in the whole of RJ..
hope this test doesn't reflect too badly on my intelligence....hope hope hope..
after that roamed at orchard..went kino and library..(decided to erm immerse myself in books since yar i read somewhere that one always got to educate oneself...)
and i always head first to the poetry section, no i am not a lit fan..
1) novels/fiction/non-fiction are too hard to read. too many words.
2) it's hard to find a good paperback. the last one i read was derailed which was erm several months back and i borrowed it cos i knew it was good since it's now a moving picture.
3) i have been reading poems..erm okay not very consistently..but i find myself always seeing the same poets..dorothy parker..robert frost..emily dickinson..Li young lee..slyia plath..
hm.
oh then i went raffles place to meet Sh! he passed me an invitation card for the high tea at grand hyatt hotel for the biomedial faculty introductory session:)
(vic refused to bring me along at her guest cos she says she didn't include me in her rsvp@#$%! i seriously can't see what's her problem! she keeps hanging up on me stupid)
i called vic because i din know where is grant hyatt.
me: hey where is that place?
vic: orchard la!
me: yar i know orchard, but orchard where?
vic: dunnoe la -SLAMS-
me: hello hello hello?
and after that i received a sms from vic saying " ask the mrt control pple stupid"
at the registration counter:
person: your name miss?
me: i am coming on behalf on my friend who's not available today but he is really interested in this course and hence i am here to listen out for him. (haha no sh is not interested in the course at all i just want to go for fun and eat)
person: ok no problem so your friend's name?
me: tan siah hong
person: (check her papers) hmmmmmmmmmmm(for a very very long time)
oh its here, and she pointed to his name in the NON attending list.
gave me a sticker and i went in for the talk..feeling so shuang3 cos i managed to crash in :)
i think the whole world is there..i can't even see the speaker i thot they were using a tape recorder.
and moments later i saw AMY!
=)
then after that yes saw vic and pf and lydia when we were all released for the tea.
well as usual vic couldn't be bothered with me.
and after talking to jing and i looked around...
yes vic is GONE.
yes she left her poor sister behind all alone...
sobz.
and i called her "WHERE ARE YOU YOU IDIOT! "
vic: 'Huh? i thot u left"
me: YAR RIGhT. so where are you now?
vic: "far east" -SLAMS PHONE-
ok anyway i was vv tired wanted to go home but i saw .sheryl!
so accompanied sheryl to her parent's car to change her shoes cos she says she doesn't want to talk around in heels.
okay anyway sheryl told me she is meeting vic and asks me where vic is.
so i called vic again..
me: where are you?
vic: FAr east! i tell you already what!
me:you think i want to look for you is it! sheryl wants to find you la!
@#$%!@
anyway i accompanied sheryl to far east...
and i had to call vic again cos i dunnoe which part of far east.
Me:where you?
vic: far east!
me: i know far east! but far east where?
vic: watts in
me: where is watts in?
vic: beside 77th street 3rd storey...*blah blah..*
me; (too tired to speak)
*passes fone to sheryl and told sheryl to ask vic to come to us instead*
smart move..
so after a vvvv long time, vic finally appeared with pf....
and so i left them and yar i went home:)
tcm and bio med..*wrinkles nose*
sigh.
all things charming
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Thursday, May 11, 2006
5/11/2006 07:18:00 PM
i think i need to have a brain transplant.
1) was talking to jenny and enqi yesterday night and halfway sh called. went to bedroom to talk on the fone and fell asleep after that.
as a result i didn't log off messenger. so i was logged in as online for 18 hours until i come home today and i thot vic will help me offline but yar, i am still online with like 10 blinking conversation windows. -_- beng4 neh..
2) i think i gave IDA sh's hp no. instead of mine. so IDA sent sms to sh instead of me.
this is not the first time.... i filled in sh's hp no. in the resumes that i sent to job agencies ...as a result poor sh had to my PA LOL
anyway, today boss treated us to lunch at dragongate.
=) welcome lunch for yagura-san neh!
i had to stuff myself with feng chao and cha sao bao cos no one wants to eat cos no one likes bao or feng chao..cos u see it's buffet sort so u can order as much dimsum as u like..-_- so yar i ordered the cha sao bao and feng chao in 2ndround.. lucky i was wearing black today (okay i wear black EVERYDAY) and a loose skirt...
haha but i realised my stomach quite flexible..as in if i dun eat i dun feel hungry and if i eat a lot i dun really feel that full... that's good.
sick of working leh..database database database big database must split my excel window into 4 panels .. yar i know i shouldn't complain. i am paid to do it..but that irking databse ..the database that killed my soul for 2 + months...now it is back to haunt me..yea. oh wells.
REN3!! 2 more weeks to go!!
today went to canon repair centre to drop boss's camera for repair.. the place is nice! they revamped it..now there are spacious blue couches... and a coffee dispenser..and no need to wait..
and the customer service officer that attended to me is so sweet.:) i am so beng4 lor, dun even know the add of NEC..lucky they have the records..
haha and yesterday i went to the laundryshop downstairs to help collect boss's coats...
me do bao2 dui2 de4.. hahaha
jenny and i want to be SE promoter! can't find string go in v. hard!
aiyah maybe i should just drop out from the hp industry and just conc on jabra..
or maybe i should retain the post of nec promoter..
or maybe i should find other stuff to promote...
hm..
i want to go K BOX!
vic is stupid lor. retarded. yar her legs is retarded. why? cos she works at novena, and my father always fetch her i dunnoe why.
and me? harbour front! that is freaking far! and how i go home? by train like everyone else!
my job made me realise something.
education is important. it is v. important. v.v.v important, unless u want to stare at a computer the whole day at excel sheets and do things like collecting laundry and be reduced to an ah soh look alike.
yar..so education is v. important okay.
of cos education is impt, but it isn't everything. two pple who have the same degree may take home different pay..of cos higher pay doesnt mean a better job..
hm.
so i conclude that...what happens in life is destined? but we have to try our best in whatever we do...
would like to end off with my favourite poem :
Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveller, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth;
Then took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim,
Because it was grassy and wanted wear;
Though as for that the passing there
Had worn them really about the same,
And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I kept the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way,
I doubted if I should ever come back.
I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I--
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.
The Road Not Taken - Robert Frost
there are many ways to interpret this poem i guess...yar but i am no lit student..so haha..
u know what?
life is beautiful...because of you.
all things charming
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Wednesday, May 10, 2006
5/10/2006 11:10:00 PM
i just envy amy!! love to drop at her place lor..cos she has such a private corner..in fact she is alone...
and an extra chair! and newspapers and a clean and germ free environment..lots of space and cabinet...
er not like me..the new jap colleague come in le..wah big shot .. big manager..
that means one more pair of eyes..
damn..can't even put my head on the table now..tmr better go in earlier..
aiyah sick of working le. verrrrry the sian leh. ok i shall stop complaining.
want to take day off next week so can go kbox!
today tut was...erm.......
i don't know..i was recaping key concepts with her..she gave me a shock!!!
i was like " TMR is your exam!! and u tell me u don't know..u know right? tell me u are just tired and can't think properly..."
anyway think she really tired diao4 le...cos i like drilling her for 2 hours..so in the end guess her brain went a little burnt.
hope tmr she will whiz her paper. hope i wasn't pushing her too hard..i guess if i were in her shoes i can't think properly if this mad person keeps raising her voice and repeating things over and over again :(
oh and her sec 4 brother asked me sec4 maths question..think his exam over here..
i was erm..pretty nervous lor. cos he asked me about this chim question on geometry..and i forgot all my maths ..besides pri3 one la. and i said to myself aloud ' parellellogram..hm..180 degrees inside,,: and he said ' no, 360.."..but so heng4 managed to spot the isocsoles triangle and the alternate angle..phew..or else will be so embarrasing lor!! cos his mother, my tut kid and him was all looking at me do the question...
what else to talk about..nothing else..things are boring..*yawn*..
yar pretty boring....
what else to say neh??
oh apparently jenny is experiencing the same fate as me...
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hellooooo
it's wednesday today..
tmr is the last working day of the week..horray!
and no deployment this weekend
:D
*yawn*
yesterday tut was okay..although sh thinks i am pressurizing her by pushing her
but pressure is good yar?
today got tut again.her exam tmr...must push push push..
so sleepy....... oh yes today i managed to get a seat on the mrt...:D ok..no big deal..but still it's nice to get a seat.
oh yes anyone heard the podcasting ..erm relating PAP and gomez..
the ba chuo mee man and this customer who insisted he did say he didn't want pig liver in his ba chuo mee before the ba chou mee man made his ba chuo mee. so the ba chuo mee man proved to him that the customer didn't say it on his CCTV.
and the ba chuo mee man wanted the poor customer to explain why he insisted he did say he didnt want pig liver when he in fact he only pointed at the meepok and said 'dry' and pointed at the chilly sauce. and the customer said sorry but the ba chuo mee man demanded an explanation..-_-"
LOTFR.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
i believe in fate and destiny **
all things charming
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Monday, May 08, 2006
5/08/2006 07:43:00 PM
i don't know why but my internet isn't working, nvm shall just blog in notepad first :)
yea! today is non-working day for my office:)so stayed at home today..
anyway yesterday went out with my parents..
went to watch RJCO concert at the esplanade in the evening. really brought back so many memories.. xiang3 dan1 nian2, i was sitting on the stage blasting my suona..frantically counting bars...listening out for yin1 zhun2..watching conductor..haha!
and of cos...all the times i spent with my rjco peers...
j1:the musty CO room back at mount sinai..i could almost smell it..
haha..at first i didn't even know how to read the stupid scores. all full of stupid numbers..sometimes just feel like crushing it..lol
and the dusty half classrooms we had sectionals in..remembered it was always so damn hot..with just a pathetic retarded fan..and the RJ uniform is like 1 inch thick and doesn't absorb sweat.. felt like taking off my shirt LOL anyway no one will see cos they like to put suona sectionals miles away from everyone else so won't disturb anyone and it's seems to be always just me alone for sectionals.
practised until my lips turned like sausage..me frantically slapping on lip balm in fear of distorted lips (haha like how can it help) and how i always doddled on the blackboard when i was bored. would be so sian3 at times but din feel like doing my hw..and blasting the suona out of the windows..feeling like top of the world at times and shit at other times cos i played until like a disgusting duck quacking.
recalled i played in the CO room pple always gan3 me out cos too noisy..
and the many lunches/dinners we had at ghim moh food centre.. and all of lao zhou's jokes..and the many combined pract that suona stoned..either we got lost or either we not needed
j2:and the brightly lit CO room at bishan..and how our section gets to sit on the platform..bird eye's view of everyone.but funny uh j2 didnt seem as fun.
and there was the much stressful SYF..oh and our last concert.....although can't really remembered any of the songs we played le..
except fei tian and dong hai yu ge! oh and dihong reminded me of chang heng mian mian
CO was really an amazing journey...haha and i thot of how sh was like back in j1 LOL. but dun remember him much except of him always buried in his yangqin and me being always super bored and sian and wuliao.
ha, ok back to the present. really enjoyed the cello and double bass piece yesterday:) kind of sorrowful yar..and saw sh on the stage..haha so funny he had to play percussion,yangqin and suona..so zai neh! aiyah poor sh so busy at mdc still must be guest player must be a pretty stressed time for him..and me only know whole day complain about my sore eye and my tiredness and my sianness
anyway met sh before the concert to pass him oreo cheesecake and the voodoo keychain! it's so cute lor you can move its limbs and its head LOL then i went to library to read newspapers. din know they have a very nice art cafe there..must go with sh next time.
oh and i saw dihong so asked him to next to me since i was all alone although his seat is the more ex one. sigh..funny, dun keep in contact with anyone much in CO anymore so din know anyone else who was going. ok ok i know i loser la.
after the concert saw all the seniors..and enjun says one day must gather and he will treat all of us to crystal jade:)
oh i was so hungry during the concert cos i didn't had dinner..and i din have much appetite in the afternoon..and my gastric pain came so sh and i went to makansutra to have supper:)
vic asked me to go along with her to kbox today but my throat not well enough to sing. and my sore eye still there
anyway i entertained myself with the piano and trying out beatbox..erm i know i very wuliao la.
and now the internet is down i dunnoe why.
oh enqi having barbeque on friday vesak day but sh not free and the idea of going alone doesn't seem very fun yar..
aiyah tmr need to go to work le..
yea internet is up!
vic is late from k box and made her poor tut kid wait so our mom made her waffles.
aiyah i got tut at potong pasir tmr..chiam see tong again..why the pple support him so much neh? vic says if she can vote and she is in potong pasir she will vote him too?
yea for the next election i can vote!! and get the progress package! my sheng2 sheng1 de2 yi1 piao4
PAP peeps were on their lorry and it just drove past below..with a blasty loudspeaker ' thankyou for your support. we will work closely with you to make amk a better place"
but here is yck not amk neh..
and i waved LOL. and the person waved back.
wait was he already waving in the first place..
shit super band start liao...
all things charming
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Sunday, May 07, 2006
5/07/2006 12:34:00 AM
today i went j8 to meet sh and poa got sale!!=)
anyway then sh and i went ps carrefour to grab food, then went ECP for picnic. got a gumball dispenser from action city-happy.
probably first and last picnic though it was nice enjoying the breeze and spending time together
1) there were flies trying to taste our roast chicken and ribs and tuna. and sh trapped a fly accidentally in the bag of ribs!! ew!!!! gives me goosebumps. ;o
2) a lot of pple around, there was this bangaldesh bunch sitting near us. dun get me wrong, i dun discriminate!!
3) radio reception is retarded
4) we threw away the strawberry shaped spreader accidentally
5) too troublesome to lug food there
6) very difficult to sit properlyon the mat wearing a skirt. sh not very happy hehe but can't help it i dun buy shorts.
after that we walked to parkway parade and on our way we past by a petshop. puppies on sale...i think anyone who sees them will want to bring one home immediately. but me prefer cats anytime.
1) i am allergic to dogs. my face and eyes get red and swollen and my whole body will itch so much i feel like biting my skin off
2) well..cats are so much quieter and they exhibit this charm and charisma and mysteriousness. but cat shit is really smelly. ok so does all shit.
went coffebean and decorated our hp and wallet with cat stickers.
=)
was so tired on the mrt train...and this foreign worker sent beside me. he had long hair.. and OMG. he smelled like he hasn't washed himself and his headmop for days..no ,weeks... and sh said he couldn't smell anything! the foreign worker shifted fortunately. oh man i wonder if he has fleas.
there this drunkard loitering/shaking his body at the heeren roadshow a few months ago and he smelled like that too and all the promoters were so disgusted they fled off to a corner.
aiyah my eye is red!! dunnoe why. contact lens' fault.
:( sad.
if there is an interview an the interviewers were to ask me what is my greatest regret in life i would probably say not taking care of my eyes when i was young. so now have to wear glasses/lens =(
list of things to do and places to go with sh to be added to previous list. bugis suntec orchard is getting boring.
-bowling
-visit pet safari
- pulau ubin
- go try the XO fish head mee fen recommended by sh at some ulu place
- cut our hair together. me want to highlight :)
-cable car at sentosa.
aiyah poor sh tmr still have to wake up early for mdc. me can sleep until late afternoon then go for concert:)
-------------------------------------------------------------------------
it was as if someone threw an axe on my nicely framed jigsaw puzzle. one by one, the pieces fell apart onto the floor scattered with glass shards.
it hurts. and it stings.
--------------------------------------------------------------------
life is really full of turns.
if uphill is my only route, with only the snowflakes and orange leaves and blooming asters as my company through the seasons of time,
i am afraid i will fall halfway...
facedown- crushed bones in a pool of blood
and a smiling face.
the picture in the jisaw puzzle might not be a reality.
but i am glad to have once pieced it together. it may be an illusion, but its beauty is imperishable.
but deep in the heart lies a painful regret...
-------------------------------------------------------------------
would u use the pair of sissors instead?
i'm sorry but pain is the painkiller.
or is it?
walking barefooted on a road laid with glass shards and pieces of jigaw puzzle. the day seems to become grayer everyday.
the footsteps soon cease to exist...
-------------------------------------------------------------------
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Friday, May 05, 2006
5/05/2006 11:18:00 PM
me now drinking tomato juice and waiting for sh's call.
tsk tsk.
-_-
looking forward to FREEDOM! after may i am free!!
probably working part time or something like that :):)
omg
i stepped on something on the floor! something sharp!
something which pierced all the way into the bottom of my sole.
bleeding now...
cos i was emptied my handbag which is stuffed with junk, including some lone studs.
and i stepped right onto a stud with the needle pointing upwards.
boohoo.
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i am living in a haze..and am badly affected by it.
1) i forgot to bring my hp. and i was POSITIVE i placed it in my bag this morning.
2) i went orchard to shop for a mothers' day gift. i board the train home and at novena, i realised i left my plastic bag of junk that i cleared out from my office desk at The Body Shop.
3) took the opposite train back to Orchard. initially i didn't want to go back for it since it is JUNK anyway. but i remembered i dropped something into the plastic bag earlier, which isn't junk. i thot to myself ' it is my atm card? no, it's with me..my wallet? no... house key?? oh shit! what am i going to do if i lost my house keys..no it's my hp!! "
but i realised i din bring my hp at all.
then it hit me i dropped my apple into the plastic bag in the office. but i remembered it was something of a bit of value. and it hit me again that i dropped my mp3 player into it.
anyway didn't panick since the mp3 player is a crummy and pathetic one, high time to get a new one from creative, and if it is gone, good..out of sight, out of mind.
anyway as expected my plastic bag was in the body shop. who will take a bag of junk anyway.
sigh.
i can't stand it.. why i am so forgetful?
when i left the body shop the sales girl even had to remind me to collect my items off the counter. -_-
and who is to blame?
yes. the haze.
it's the haze.
the haze of depression.............
once u are caught in it..taking the train is such a difficulty.
the train feels like an airplane seriously.
i cant help but feel supicious of the pple around me. as in strangers.
i am really worried for my tut kid. what if she doesn't do well?
i would be so disappointed in myself, once again, like how i always do.
sighh.
sometimes u may think life is hard.
the maths question isn't hard. it's just that u are stupid.
so if u find life is hard, it's because u aren't good enough.
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hm..was deciding whether to have lunch with my colleagues
cos the idea of surfing the net while talking to sh on the fone and munching on takeaway sounds really attractive.
i used a function from excel today which helped me to count the no. of cells with corresponding data!
bill gates rocks! Excel is amazing!!
=)
sighhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
monday is a public holiday right? but sh has mdc practice. *whines*
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Thursday, May 04, 2006
5/04/2006 10:12:00 PM
tut lesson went horrible.
abstract:
i felt like dying. i dunnoe why but my throat felt very bad and my stomach very bloated. i really felt i was going to faint on the table.
and my tut kid isn't helping at all.
me: (in a raspy voice) why don't u get it? how many times have i told you...let me ask u again, this person has 3 books. the other has 2 books. how many more books does this person has?
tutkid: (shakes head)
me: the difference..
tutkid: 5
me: am i speaking in manadarin......... am i not speaking in english? are u in kindergarden? 5 is the sum..so the difference also 5...?
-----after 5 mins or so--------
my tut kid finally said 1 !! this is a problem of MISCOMMUNICATION!! obviously she knows it is one but she somehow doesn't understand my question although i repeated it 10 over times!!! (btw this is one part of a quite hard question. pri 3 of cos not just 3-2)
and do u know it is so embarrasing if u lose your alertness as a tut teacher??
me: (after explaining problem sum in a huffy manner) so u know how to do now??
tutkid: (points to her answer) (her answer was correct all along!!! and i thought it was wrong and went on lecturing like some moron)
me: -silence- (i felt like crying at that time. how stupid am I??? i mean really!! how can i be that DUMB?? and i was mean to her by lecturing like some know-it-all when her answer is right before my eyes?? i tell you i almost wanted to run out of the door...)
whatever. i am so glad i rejected 3 tut assignment lobang from my friends. phew.
tut is a big responsibility.
and i have been trying my best by extending lessons from the original 1 hour to 1 h 30 mins or 2 h everytime. (FOC Of cos)
so worried u know. her sa1 is next week !!!
model drawing is still a problem...........
hiaz..
sigh.
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okie.
so i just finished clearing my office desk- scrubbed until it's sparkling clean (oh man there were so many coffee stains and dirt and pen/pencil marks - my manager told me to be more responsible cos it isnt MY desk... hm), emptied the drawers, threw away loads of junk and vacuumed the carpet.
cos the new japanese colleague coming in next week.
i look at my new seat.and *shakes head*
some lone pcs/server under the desk.
have to squeeze my body between those..
absolutely no space to stretch my legs, even by 1 cm.
plus my screen is going to be exposed to everyone in the room.
boohoo.
i asked the toilet aunty where to rinse the rag she replied in chinese with a bu4 shuang3 face : ask me for what? i don't know la!
-_-
what's her problem? the other time i lost the toilet key asked her if she had seen it she made so much noise too.
sherlin told me its the effect of facing too many toilet bowls.
i feel like an weak old lady seriously. i feel sooooo happy to find a seat in the MRT.
i had such a creepy dream yesterday. i was taking the lift..wanted to go to 1st floor,but the lift only went up no matter how i pressed the button 1.
and guess what i did? i stepped out of the lift and jumped off the building!!
did anyone watch yong3 bu4 yan2 bai4 yesterday? it was so hilarious.
i dunnoe , but i thot the funny dance movements were meant to make them look funny? so we can laugh at them?
and oh man that steven seriously can't rap and he seemed so proud of himself for completing the rap part of wilbur's microphone song..
those pple don't have the looks, they CAN'T sing, they CAN'T dance..
so what is the point..? yea the whole point is that we can laugh at them until we pee!
rotten dance and horrible breathless raspy singing.
i dun mean to make fun of them ok, but they are on national tv uh.
if i go there and dance i will even be much much worse than any of them.
i can't even dance our orientation soreilas lor. pathetic. 1) i cant remember any of the steps for goodness sake so i end up copying those in front of me which makes me look like some retarded fool 2) i am sooo retarded. i have learning problem or what. pple take 1 min i must take 10 days to learn a single step.
to think that pple who dunnoe me thot i am in hip hop as my cca. funny like hell. me? hiphop?mabye if u look at me i am so funky i look like i am hip hop..looks are always deciving aren't they? er okay i only look cool if i dress coo and nice nice makeupl . if u see me in my office wear..sorry i am just another boring worker - haggard.
i envy amy! her new seat is so HEAVEN.
1) she gets to sit alone as in there aren't pple around her
2) she has loads of space and new stationary!!
3) her screen is facing the wall no one knows what she is doing.
i just thot of my dent again i want to cry le..........
sobZ
tmr have to go down to northpoint to do setup for roadshow..
it's good this job gives me such a variety of work i guess..
hm..to put it in another way, i am just da3 zha2 one.
haha.
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Wednesday, May 03, 2006
5/03/2006 05:57:00 PM
it's nearing 6 soon.
i have supposedly recovered from my flu.
but i dunknow why but my throat feels like a dirty drainpipe stuck with grime (phglem)
someone do me a favour stick a toilet brush in.
i seem to be feeding on countless herbal candy and fisherman's friend.
now i finally truly understand why smoking is so bad.
it is bad because it leads to a smelly mouth, stained teeth with disgusting tar tar built up and bleeding gums.
i used to wonder why pple associate bad breathe with cigarettes. i mean smoke doesn't smell bad , to me at least
after reading 'the oral health bible' and other books like 'a guide for healthy gums and teeth' and 'prospects in dentistry' and 'the whole tooth' (pathetic. how does reading dental books help u in your interview? u only need to have a smart and intelligent mind to win an interview)
i learnt that the bad breathe is due to pus coming out from your gums cos your gums are so much more prone to peridontal disease, rather than the cigarette itself.
i am so glad i have become a more educated person.
i finally understand why smoking is BAD! as in B-A-D BAD.
i mean all along i understand smoking leads to cancer cos of the carcinogens and the 500 toxic chemicals found in cigarettes. and all those chim chim words we learn in bio..bronchitis disease ?
but not really TRULY understand the effects.
that is what education is about.
that is what i call REAL education uh.
see? i am so stupid.
i don't even know the potential harm of a cigarette.
maybe i should start despising pple who smoke.
maybe we should be sympathetic instead.
they are just ignorant. not really ignorant as in they dun even know a single thing. they just don't REALLY know that's all. u must be thinking : how can they not know? there are ugly pictures of black lungs and arteries ozzing goo on the cigarette boxes.
but what do pictures mean? pictures are only pictures. they dun tell anything. this is not education.
if u smoke you get bad breathe...(halitosis) ew. firstly your bf/gf will stop talking to you.
then u might get oral / lung cancer!
OMG. cancer.. pain...this is REAL SERIOUS pain
i used to think cancer is no big deal. u just go through those chemo/radio therarpy (is this a wrong spelling?) and if u find it difficult u can always slit your wrist.
see this is so stupid. how can i have such thoughts? because slitting your wrist is easy, but it is not gonna be easy for the ones around you.
i finally finally realise what a fool i am.
finally what vic has been telling me along makes lots of sense.
i am just this BIG IGNORANT IDIOT.
knowing stuff is different from UNDERSTANDING stuff.
oh dear.
i really want to cry.
i am not an educated person at all.
education is wasted on me.
pathetic, isn't it.
i dun know why, but history seems really to repeat itself.
i know i can stop it.
i know i can. because i have you now :)
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it's a wednesday Morning today.
good morning.
hm.. i guess i have to focus on something else until the ugly truth finally breaks in.
here is a interesting list of places and things to do with sh , besides shopping and eating :
-visit butter factory (no it isn't really a butter factory :) )
-go to ECP and have a picnic , cycling..
- K box
-Steamboat at Marina Bay
-MOVIE MANIA - daisy! superman, X men
sounds fun uh
sighhhhhhhhh
still quite depressed ..and MDC is so mean!!
poor sh.
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Tuesday, May 02, 2006
5/02/2006 09:42:00 PM
it was a hot afternoon.
the callous sun cast
my shrunken shadow on the ground-
a sad solitary figure.
something caught my eye.
amidst the heap of dried grey leaves
was a shocking electric blue...
i bent down to take a closer look
it was a butterfly - not a single stir.
very gently, i cradled it in my hands-
still, a cold unmoving picture.
pretty blue butterfly-
pressed between the pages,
of my old Oxford Dictonary.
soon, the amazing blue faded
while the spatter of red on the pages
grew
day by day
outside the window,
the clouds continue to drift
the sun continues to shine
in the honey warm breeze.
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ok.
i have stopped whining/weeping about what happened today.
i know i have failed terribly, and miserably.
i have disappointed myself.
i'm sorry i 've lost.
i'm sorry i am such a failure.
and to make things worse, i have been losing control and putting on the ' i hate the world' attitude and wallowing myself in self-pity.
if anyone is at fault, it's me.
yes. me and my horribly slow and retarded brain.
and vic, i really thot u are the meanest person ever alive.
what can i do now but wait for the brown envelope?
life has to go on, no matter what. the waves won't stop crashing.
the earth won't stop revolving round the sun. because of me.
i feel myself breathing all the same.
someone tell me that life's still worth living.
someone tell me that NTU's double degree IT & biz is still a pretty good choice.
i still have to go to work tmr.
although i really want to stay at home and lie on my bed and watch my ceiling.
or to cover my head with a blanket and force myself to go on shutting my eyes.
i am so glad my whole wardrobe is black. imagine putting on something other than black. that hurts. i can just imagine it. a green top will probably just scorch my skin underneath.
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Monday, May 01, 2006
5/01/2006 06:18:00 PM
it's so unprettyful.
it's so sad.
probably the saddest day of my life.
i don't know what to say...
but i guess in life u can't get everything you want.
it's over.
resign to your fate, elizabeth.
it's no use...
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happy may day..
it's may already..time really passes...
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